Don’t fret, just let…


Yennie Keilah Joe is no longer a guest on the blog. She has written two beautiful pieces on the blog  Social media: A blessing or a curse and Change if you have not read them please do. She has written another amazing piece on letting go, you should definitely read this. 

Emotions are rocks on which our hearts are built on. They either make or break us. Our emotions tend to guide our reactions to different happenings in our life, and based on stereotypes, people consider women to be more emotional beings than men. However, from a more balanced point of view, it can be argued that men can be emotional in certain cases or situations which could be either in the love of a lost one, a job or even from heartbreak.

A sad situation in one’s life can be really difficult and a hard knot to pull through from someone and if not properly sanctioned can even lead to depression which is a whole new ball game all together and falling into that low state is usually a long journey and most times difficult to pull through. So, it’s safe to say that having one’s emotions in check can save one from a lot of mishaps which can lead to one acting unusual from one’s normal self, decreased work output at one’s work place and general unwell being from the physical feature of a person (Yes, indeed the emotional well-being has a great impact on one’s physical well being).

Growing up as a youngster, I was quite the inquisitive one. You can say that I questioned any and everything even down to why I was my gender, why I was a girl and not a boy instead. Why I looked and felt a certain kind of way. What adults were always whining about back in school every morning on the assembly ground and why I always had to listen to them. Now these never ending questions of mine were not all answered, but the motives behind them were indeed helping in shaping my mindset about a lot of things. I got to understand that I didn’t have control over a lot of aspects of my life but the ones that I could take responsibilities for, I full hands on did and bluntly refused to take the back seat to mistakes which could drive my beat all down its sinking sail. In situations where I wasn’t in full control and regrets would inevitably set in, I simply let it go. This simple act helps in a lot of situations of life and it’s a healing antidote to a lot of emotional imbalance. (Trust me, I know).

Take a scenario of boy meets girl and they are attracted to each other. They go on to fall in love and decide to have a relationship. Down the line of the relationship, things don’t begin to go as planned and fall outs begin to occur in the relationship. There are trusts issues, communication breakouts and in the worst case scenario, a partner cheats on the other. Not necessarily because they don’t love each other anymore, but perhaps because one of the other was caught at his/her weakest moment of emotional instability and falls for the temptation. The damage is done. The other partner swears fire and brimstone at his/her unforgiveness for the other and alas! an heart break (or deep wound of the heart, whatever, you get the picture).

Weeks turn into months and healing is yet to take place in one’s heart. There is the constant struggle with anger, unforgiveness lies in one’s heart and in turn just turns into bitterness. This is a very poisonous state and can I just add that it relishes into a terrible state that one could never find his/herself. In such cases, for there to be total restoration to a subtle state of mind, it is important to simply forgive such a person, thereby releasing the person from your heart and simply let it go. In doing this, malice will be apprehended as such a person would not be held captive in one’s heart but undoubtedly set free. There will also be no room for judging others as such an option will not be there or made available. This is because the momentum to point fingers will be extinguished and from then on you’d simply just move on and let such a person go.

Also, in a situation whereby one’s job is no longer conducive enough or the work ethics is not one that such a person can work with anymore, it is ideal to simply let such a job go. I know this can be alarmingly dangerous as one will be on the verge of losing everything especially in the financial aspect, but for an obnoxious boss, terrible working conditions, unreasonable work colleagues and even in cases of minimal or peanut work pays for a hard and over the top, well done job put into to deliver the outmost output and services at one’s unhappiness, it is best to let such a job go. By doing this, you allow for new opportunities which could even be way better than what you had subjected yourself to in the past.

In approaching someone who is neck in deep into an addiction, that is trying to help someone who is struggling with an addiction (which could be of any kind). Now this is a very sensitive situation as such a person would first of all, undergo an attitudinal recheck at his/her perception of whatever he/she is battling with. This could be in form of therapy, rehab, an acute psychological evaluation as to why such an addiction has been in control and other step by step progression initiatives. An unfortunate situation in which such a patient has refused to face and take such a bold step towards rehabilitation has to understand that only a person poised to change can actually change his/her attitude and face their problems, head on it’s a personal initiative. So instead of beating up yourself over your seemingly tied hands in such a case, you just let it go and in return hope for the best. By letting such bad vibes go, it opens up your mind and your heart to good and positive thoughts and prayers for such a person.

In letting the past be the past, and letting go of the former things we tend to appreciate every single person we encounter in our lives. There are those that are there to make you happy and to keep good memories always. Those that hit you with sad feelings only make you stronger and those that are there to just catch you when you are to fall, open your eye to genuine love and trust. If you ask me what an amazing journey is, I’m going to say not fretting, just letting it go.

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